the meaning of life 2.0

a thought descended upon me tonite. out of nowhere. i hadn't been pondering anything philisophical...or anything in general, really.

in the beginning, before the fall. humanity existed for one thing. to love and glorify God in a perfect existance and a flawless world for all of eternity.

now, the reason for our existance is a shade different. before we would have simply been existing. living and loving and frolicing in the feilds. now we are no longer merely existing; we are being groomed. it all started with a desire to be on an equal level with God, and in every way that is what it's still about. the thing that i realized, the thing that rocked my world is this.

He is giving us the opportunity to try to replace Him.
the first analogy i thought of was a boxing match, and i initially didn't like it. but the more i thought about it, the more i realized that's perfect. there's a fight coming. a reckoning, if you will. and all of human existance since the fall has been our training montage.

He's giving us the chance to do our absolute best to replace him so that when fight night does come around, there will be absolutly no question as to who is superior.

Free will and mistakes

this is an incomplete essay i've been working on. i just recently found it in my notebooks and thought id post it here in hopes of some feedback. help me finish writing this B.

Is it in our power to make mistakes? The focus is so often on whether or not we have free will enough to do the things we want. But what i wonder is if we have the power to screw it up. While we're walking down the path that He has laid out for us, can we walk off it?
Free will lends the argument that He sets the goal, and we find the path that leads us there.
I'm making the argument that He sets the path, we make the mistakes, and there is only one goal. Graduation. Oneness with him.

Pirates vs. Ninjas: The Battle for Your Soul

ok. so lemme break it down for you. everyone in the world falls into one of two catagories. just two. there are no third party options. no cowboys. no astronauts. no gladiators or vikings. everyone is either a pirate or a ninja. when i ask people what catagory they fall under, quite often i get puzzled and questioning responses. all i say is "you're one or the other, which is it? look in your heart."

i'll go ahead and explain the pros and cons of either side. by that i mean i'll explain the pros of being a ninja, and the cons of being a pirate. because as anyone will tell you, ninjas freaking rule.

first of all, pirates are filthy. there's nowhere to shower on a pirate ship. whereas ninjas are well known for wearing clean, pressed ninja suits. all pirates are technically amateurs at pirating, whereas ninjas must complete years of official, diploma-awarding ninja school. pirates use guns, ninjas use jump kicks. pirates use cannons, ninjas use throwing stars. who's more tough? also, pirates are clumsy, albeit good swordfighters. ninjas, being the worlds best swordfighters, rarely have to duel anyone. they just backflip into the room and cut everyone's head off in seconds. my final point is that pirates are all gay. think about it. a whole bunch of dudes, isolated, drinking rum, no women around for months and months.

booya.
eat it, pirates.

something my family should know lots about

so i was sitting in art class this morning (TOTALLY paying attention), pondering my neurosis. i've always done my best to identify my poor/strange behaviors and correct/modify them to be more beneficial to myself and those around me. it's the least any of us can do as human beings to try better our actions and thought processes. so i was sitting there thinking about how this is going to be a lifelong process of spotting these personality oddities and shooting them down. that's when it hit me. will this behavior end up the same way everyone says is dangerous about antibiotics. the whole idea that with antibiotic drugs, any survivng bacteria is as a result resistant to that type of drugs. ending with the evolution of a super-bug that drugs dont work on, eventually killing everyone.
would the same thing be acheived by constantly trying to eliminate the strange parts of my brain? would i eventually develop some...thing, that is so far and beyond weird, that it would be life shattering.
would it be better to just settle on and accept a handful of traits (i.e. losing attention when people talk, being cheap with money, whistiling too much at innapropriate times, being afraid of puppies, ect..ect..), and call it a day?

pointless vs. futile

so the other day at work i made the comment to matt about how everything we strive for in this life is futile. wealth, knowledge, connection. all futile in that when we die, none of those things go with us. they all get left behind. and now he makes fun of me by putting on a "mcclain" voice and saying things like "oh. everything is pointless cuz we're gonna die. i shouldn't put effort into anything. blah blah blah."
i keep telling him he missed the point. just because it's futile, doesn't mean there isn't any point in trying. quite on the contrary. i think the fact that as flawed human beings who are destined to fail makes trying all the more beautiful. there's glory in a lost cause.


COMING SOON: i'm going to be writing a blog about the whole ninjas vs. pirates situation.
but i want to wait to do it until i've had a little bit to drink, that way i can be as hurtful as possible towards the pirate side of the line. why? CAUSE NINJAS FREAKIN' RULE!!!

dillema

so i was at work (well, AM at work) and my fellow lackey posed a question to me. here it is.

there are 100 people and you have a choice.
either you can take a 50/50 chance. one way all 100 live. the other way all 100 die.
OR
you can sacrifice 10 people and guarantee the saftey of the remaining 90.
what do you do?

im interested to see what you all think. i personally find it to be an incredibly stratifying (and brilliant) question. it really shows you which side of the line you stand on.

no longer too cool

so i've decided im going back to school this fall. i graduated high school 5 years ago and have minimal college credits to show for it. granted i've gotten to do more cool things in those 5 years than some people do in a lifetime, but still...cool experiences don't pay for a car or provide for a family or buy a house. so...back to school i go. i've decided to pursue my forestry degree. that way i can make a career out of wildland firefighting. you can be a fireman without an education, but with no hope of promotion. so...wish me luck, cyber-friends.

some images from our trip to montana

reason 17 of 238 why politicians are scum

so how much money gets spent on campaigns between all of the candidates. millions, surely. hundreds of millions, probably. billions, frighteningly. they spend all of this money on grade school-mindset, mudslinging television advertisements. motorcades comprised of SUV's and limos. and then they stand on television wearing their 5000 dollar suits and 500 dollar haircuts talking about how their isn't enough money. think of all the things they could do with that money. they could rebuild every home destroyed in new orleans. they could build thousands and thousands of parks. they could put a million kids through college. they could provide the health care that so much of the country lacks. they could provide the food that so much of the world lacks. but they don't do that, do they? they just sit on television talking about how they're going to find the money to help us, while they're spending the money that COULD help us.

bottom line: they don't care about us. not a single one of us. they care about their jobs. they care about their money. they care about their power.
they don't care about us.

what would jack london have to say about us?

drove out to montana saturday-sunday. it's done nothing but rain like a dickens, whatever that means. sometimes the only thing holding our tent down from blowing away in the wind is our bodies inside it. haven't gotten to do much shooting. will post more when i have time.

a tale of complete and glorious vindication

so, the college i work for is undergoing extensive remodeling. so they had me and my fellow grunts moving lots and lots of furniture of all different sizes and shapes from one big room outside to waiting boxcar containers. during our afternoon break i got on the radio and asked cynthia (all names have been changed to protect those involved) what she wanted us to start moving next. she told me specifically that we needed to move the stacks of cubicle walls. there was no misunderstanding. no stuttering. she was very clear. so i relayed this info to my coworkers and we set to moving the 500 pounds of walls for the next two hours. when i was rolling the last load of them up to the container, my boss was standing there wondering why we had moved all of that stuff in there...because it wasn't supposed to be moved. he wanted to know who's idea it was to do so and my coworkers pointed at me, as they should have because that much was true. cynthia, who was standing right there...said nothing. she let me take the fall in a big way. i was very, very angry but held my tounge. so today i did something above and beyond the call of grunt-dom and my boss made the comment "mcclain was right about something again!" i asked him what he meant and he told me that the cubicle walls did after all need to be moved.
so instead of looking stupid for something when it wasn't my fault, i ended up looking smart when i didn't deserve it!
life is good, pass this guy a brew.

barkin dogs, stick trimmers and sunburn

after some 8 weeks of being back here in wisconsin, 4 jobs, and about 10,000 job applications i finally have a solid job. i'm working at Northcentral Technical College (NTC) as a groundskeeper. it's certainly not pretty, but it's a guaranteed 40 a week. the people i work with/for are all very nice, the pay is good, and the work is honest. i'm not a big 1st shift guy, i much prefer showing up at 3 and working til 11 instead of working "normal people" hours. but hey, like i've said, it's a good job.
after sitting on my ass for 2 months, it feels really good to be sore at the end of the day. and it feels even better to crack open a beer, sit down in the garage/gentelmens lounge, and philosophise with my old man.
God is good and so are his many blessings.

an oldie but a goodie

Proof of Reality

if reality can only be proved by our senses, then there is no way to prove reality at all. just because i can see these words doesn't mean they exist. if i was blind, would they still be here? furthermore, being able to see them proves just as little. can i say for a fact that you see what i see when we look at the same thing? therefore, if the only things we are equipped with to monitor reality are completely worthless for proving it, how do we know if anything is real? we can't. the fact of the matter is that reailty isn't a matter of perception at all. it's a matter of choice. reality is what you choose to believe or choose not to believe.

God, space bubbles and sitcom stars

i just had an interesting dream. at an earlier point in the dream i was car shopping looking for vehicles to start up my own pizza delivery place. but after that was done me and a bunch of people i felt i knew at the time were on a sort of a space station on some planet. i realize now that i'm awake that none of these people were anyone i know. which makes me wonder if there are a dozen other people on this planet that had the same dream i did....anyway, they were telling me that God sometimes comes and takes people with Him to a certain place to start a new city. and sure enough, after some dream-time passed, He appeard in the form of a snapdragon flower. and there He was taking people one by one to a promised land of sorts. a spot on the planet with trees and grass (as opposed to the rocky desolate rest of the planet) and even though i saw it with my own eyes i didn't take it very seriously. so i went outside to jump around in low gravity and act silly. when i turned around to re-enter the space compound, my space-mates told me to turn around. when i did, i saw the giant flower form of God looking down at the spot i had just been. my space friends said "He came for you". i had a moment of doubt. only a very short one where i thought to myself "do i really want to go with him?" but then i ran as fast as my spacesuit would allow and leap towards Him and landing on the ground in front of Him. he said in an appropriatly booming God-voice "Hi". and he took me away to this new city of his. as i floated away, Danny Masterson from That 70s Show was standing there. i waved to him, he waved back and looked absolutly thrilled for me.

quality of life

erin is here with shirley jean in wausau for the week, as any reader of her blog will know. and lauren is headed out here on saturday. my heart is filled with so much happieness i almost started to tear up at dinner tonight. it has been years since i've gotten to even see any of these wonderful people, much less spend relaxed, quality time with them. i am so excited to have all 5 of us together again like this. i wish rich was able to be here, but he's busy with a reunion of his own.

the duffert house is once again brimming with life and there are signs of it everywhere. in true wisco-scotch fashion stomachs are full, hearts are happy and communication is exercised. there is nowhere in the world i would rather be than with these people.

the study of misunderstanding

why do we misunderstand one another? with the infinie possibilities of a moment multiplied by the infinite possible interpretations of each of those moments, you are forced to ask, how do we manage to understand each other at all? pile on top of that the decietful and self-loathing human heart, it's a wonder we bother trying to communicate in the first place. the desire to communicate stems from the fact that we are all alone in our own worlds, our minds; completely isolated from the rest of the world. if you stop taking the language for granted, you realize it's nothing more than a brave, desperate, and wholly inadequate attempt to bridge this gap between us. language is dead. feelings and emotions are alive. so if we use these dead words to describe our feelings, thoughts, and emotions. we're not really doing them justice. which is why you'll find the best of friends, the luckiest of people, and the most honest of communications within unspoken things. it comes back to our motivation to keep moving forward through time, that being this lack of truth, and our quests single greatest speedbump; ourselves. if the heart is deceitful above all things, then we are lying to ourselves all the time and are damn good at it. so the question ceases to be "are they wrong?" and becomes "am i?"

if memory is the culprit, then time is his boss.

moving companies, sexual harrassment and binoculars

so today was my first day working for graeble van lines, a moving company based here in wausau. we were out at U W Stevens Point moving offices across campus. yesterday everyone attended sexual harassment training. i missed it as i had a prior engagement, but i can only assume it was a solemn and productive experience for everybody involved. this much was apparent to me at lunch time when i walked outside to see the guys ogling a sunbathing co-ed with no less than a pair of binoculars i assume came from the inappropriate sexual activity tool box.

it's nice to see social etiquette training in action.
more than anything, this made me miss my frat brothers.