something my family should know lots about

so i was sitting in art class this morning (TOTALLY paying attention), pondering my neurosis. i've always done my best to identify my poor/strange behaviors and correct/modify them to be more beneficial to myself and those around me. it's the least any of us can do as human beings to try better our actions and thought processes. so i was sitting there thinking about how this is going to be a lifelong process of spotting these personality oddities and shooting them down. that's when it hit me. will this behavior end up the same way everyone says is dangerous about antibiotics. the whole idea that with antibiotic drugs, any survivng bacteria is as a result resistant to that type of drugs. ending with the evolution of a super-bug that drugs dont work on, eventually killing everyone.
would the same thing be acheived by constantly trying to eliminate the strange parts of my brain? would i eventually develop some...thing, that is so far and beyond weird, that it would be life shattering.
would it be better to just settle on and accept a handful of traits (i.e. losing attention when people talk, being cheap with money, whistiling too much at innapropriate times, being afraid of puppies, ect..ect..), and call it a day?

pointless vs. futile

so the other day at work i made the comment to matt about how everything we strive for in this life is futile. wealth, knowledge, connection. all futile in that when we die, none of those things go with us. they all get left behind. and now he makes fun of me by putting on a "mcclain" voice and saying things like "oh. everything is pointless cuz we're gonna die. i shouldn't put effort into anything. blah blah blah."
i keep telling him he missed the point. just because it's futile, doesn't mean there isn't any point in trying. quite on the contrary. i think the fact that as flawed human beings who are destined to fail makes trying all the more beautiful. there's glory in a lost cause.


COMING SOON: i'm going to be writing a blog about the whole ninjas vs. pirates situation.
but i want to wait to do it until i've had a little bit to drink, that way i can be as hurtful as possible towards the pirate side of the line. why? CAUSE NINJAS FREAKIN' RULE!!!

dillema

so i was at work (well, AM at work) and my fellow lackey posed a question to me. here it is.

there are 100 people and you have a choice.
either you can take a 50/50 chance. one way all 100 live. the other way all 100 die.
OR
you can sacrifice 10 people and guarantee the saftey of the remaining 90.
what do you do?

im interested to see what you all think. i personally find it to be an incredibly stratifying (and brilliant) question. it really shows you which side of the line you stand on.

no longer too cool

so i've decided im going back to school this fall. i graduated high school 5 years ago and have minimal college credits to show for it. granted i've gotten to do more cool things in those 5 years than some people do in a lifetime, but still...cool experiences don't pay for a car or provide for a family or buy a house. so...back to school i go. i've decided to pursue my forestry degree. that way i can make a career out of wildland firefighting. you can be a fireman without an education, but with no hope of promotion. so...wish me luck, cyber-friends.

some images from our trip to montana

reason 17 of 238 why politicians are scum

so how much money gets spent on campaigns between all of the candidates. millions, surely. hundreds of millions, probably. billions, frighteningly. they spend all of this money on grade school-mindset, mudslinging television advertisements. motorcades comprised of SUV's and limos. and then they stand on television wearing their 5000 dollar suits and 500 dollar haircuts talking about how their isn't enough money. think of all the things they could do with that money. they could rebuild every home destroyed in new orleans. they could build thousands and thousands of parks. they could put a million kids through college. they could provide the health care that so much of the country lacks. they could provide the food that so much of the world lacks. but they don't do that, do they? they just sit on television talking about how they're going to find the money to help us, while they're spending the money that COULD help us.

bottom line: they don't care about us. not a single one of us. they care about their jobs. they care about their money. they care about their power.
they don't care about us.

what would jack london have to say about us?

drove out to montana saturday-sunday. it's done nothing but rain like a dickens, whatever that means. sometimes the only thing holding our tent down from blowing away in the wind is our bodies inside it. haven't gotten to do much shooting. will post more when i have time.